Stupidity of Mankind (Humour)

In case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed through  stupidity, here are some actual label instructions on consumer goods.

1. On a Sear's hairdryer:

"Do not use while sleeping."

[Darn, and that's the only time I have to work on my hair.]

2.On a bag of Fritos:

"You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside."

[The shoplifter special?]

3. On a bar of Dial soap:

"Directions: Use like regular soap."

[And that would be how.....???]

4. On some Swanson frozen dinners:

"Serving suggestion: Defrost."

[But, it's "just" a suggestion.]

5. Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom):

"Do not turn upside down."

[Well...duh, a bit late, huh?]

6. On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding:

"Product will be hot after heating."

[... and you thought???]

7. On packaging for a Rowenta iron:

"Do not iron clothes on body."

[But wouldn't this save me more time?]

8. On Boot's Children Cough Medicine:

"Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication."

[We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5-year-olds with head-colds off those forklifts.]

9. On Nytol Sleep Aid:

"Warning: May cause drowsiness."

[And ...I'm taking this because???]

10. On most brands of Christmas lights:

"For indoor or outdoor use only."

[As opposed to... what?]

11. On a Japanese food processor:

"Not to be used for the other use."

[Now, somebody out there, help me on this. I'm a bit curious.]

12. On Sainsbury's peanuts:

"Warning: contains nuts."

[Talk about a news flash]

13.On an American Airlines packet of nuts:

"Instructions: open packet, eat nuts."

[Step 3: maybe, uh...fly Delta?]

14. On a child's superman costume:

"Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly."

[I don't blame the company. I blame the parents for this one.]

15. On a Swedish chainsaw:

"Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals."

[Oh my God...was there a lot of this happening somewhere?]